I have been busy and walked a lot this past week. To grocery store, to the woods and to the city of Trondheim. The dizziness is a challenge especially when out in the woods on the uneven surface. I feel drunk but haven’t drunk a drop. Luckily I haven’t fallen over yet, and hope it won’t happen. It has been refreshing walking so much 🙂 All walks from home.
Had several walks to Estenstad marka and first visit was Burma klippen, me on the edge. I am too dizzy to stand up:
A view of the city:
Another view of the city:
Where I walked up into the woods:
How far I walked:
Then I walked to the city of Trondheim on Wednesday with my neighbor:
I did a tandem skydive in August 2013. My son was here on his summer holidays so he came with me. I knew some of the others that did do skydive with me. I must say that it is plain crazy to jump out of a plane and rely on some fabric to safely land on earth again. I am glad I was hooked up to another person to guide the parachute safely back to ground.
That feeling falling through the air is awesome. And the view of the world was amazing. My son was looked after by people on the ground. He came running to me when I had safely landed again. “Crazy mummy” lol yeah I agree with him 🙂
It has to be the day I gave birth to my son. I remember sitting up on my knees in the hospital bed, yeah I believe in gravity. After a lot of pushing he finally came out and landed on the bed. I picked him up and was the first to hold on to him in my arms ❤ That moment is still my happiest memory in life.
My hands was tied up to the couch. The abuser tried to penetrate me but it hurt and I made a sound. He grabbed my neck and next thing everything went black and dead silent. I couldn’t even hear my body sounds. Next ting I remember is him on top of me and I was still tied up. He was breathing air into me and backed off in despair saying “You must not die”, all red faced and sweaty white T-shirt. Same time trying to shake my body. It was hard to breath I remember. The inside from my mouth and to my lungs felt like dry sandpaper. I was SO thirsty. He must had strangled me and made me unconscious so I stopped breathing. He had left marks on my neck that later disappeared.
It took a long time for the marks to disappeared. Just a few days later the person that gave birth to me noticed them and made a remark. “Stop pinching yourself it makes a mark”, I tried to explain what happened but she wouldn’t listen. I went out in the hall way and looked in the mirror. My fingers were to small to fit into the marks. I grabbed a hairbrush and smashed the mirror.
Later I went on using a scarf to cover it up. I wore it in school classes too, even at swimming pool but there I ended up taking it off. I got remarks from a few but can’t remember what I told them.
Sorry I haven’t written much this year. The coronavirus has hit us all hard. So far I have staid safe from it.
My life didn’t change that much. I live alone and have one best friend I see often before the virus hit. I used to go to cinema, out eating and for at least one walk every day.
This last week I have been able to eat out and meet up with my friend again. We just don’t hug. It was good to see her again and we ate at ice cream shop in the city. I also ate at Burger King and at a cafe last week as they have opened up for service again. I have kept up going for a walk at least once a day now that the gym is still closed. The cinema has opened again and I am not sure when I dare to go there yet.
I wish I could say yes, but the answer is no. I’m stuck for life with MS. Unless there comes up a miracle cure for it in my life time.
I had set a goal to get along with MS and battle it with medication that put the disease at hold. But I think one of my lessions are affecting my balance and keep getting me dizzy every time I go for a walk anywhere. Even small walks indoors get me dizzy. No I’m not drunk, I don’t drink. Its been long ago I had something strong to drink.. That crushes my hope to even try get back in the working life.
I have started to go the gym two times a week to see if I can battle the dizziness. My GP told me to try it out so we will see. Treadmill and rowing machine. And not to forget to stretch out after each time to avoid stiffness. I also try keep up getting a walk every day when I’m not going to the gym.
I don’t know how many people there is that pretend to be someone else, but there is a lot of them on Twitter. I don’t know what they want to achieve from their victims other than to lead them to believe they are in love with them and some lure them from money.
I don’t have a lot of followers on Twitter only around 150. Out of them I have some celebrities like Nicolas Cage, Thomas Rhett, Alan Jackson, Keanu Reeves and lots of Kenny Chesney profiles. I have talked with some of them, some have asked for get them iTunes cards. Some have used poorly photo shopped pictures and I know they are an impostor. I find it sad and a little frustrating people go the length to lure people for money and worst of all lure them emotionally. Actually I drives me a little mad because the celebrities have worked so hard to get where they are.
Twitter is broken for my part I won’t answer back to any celebrities through there anymore. If so any celebrity would like to talk with me a small nobody from Norway they need to find another way to get to me.
I been a fool to believe that a celebrity would be in love with me… It involved paying money. He used photo shopped pictures that I discovered after two years. We never met for real in that period of time. Only chatted online no live video or phone calls. I let him use his status as excuse. A professional fraudster that might do the same to other people than me too.
It feels like empty space and fooled around emotionally too leave me in a state of shock. I hadn’t been in a relationship in years when I got involved with him two years ago. It is going to take me time to have any faith in any man again…
Lately I have taken some walks around my area where I live. Both in the woods and along the road. I have listened to the noise around me. Birds singing, aeroplanes above, dogs barking, people talking on the phone and with each other, cars, motorbike, ATV, bus, lorry and people talking with me. I have met people that were drunk, some was out jogging, some riding their bike, some sat at bench, some just out walking with their dog and some just walked.
… but the most annoying thing is me feeling dizzy. Like “drunk” but haven’t had anything to drink. I felt like walking on a boat in stormy weather and the waves are heavy. Lucky I keep on my feet and don’t crash to the ground. This is how my MS work when I am out walking. I wish there was some way to make the dizziness to vanish it’s sooo annoying!
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