Christmas 2011

A very Merry Christmas to you ❤ And to you who don't celebrate any of these days, I hope you enjoy life too 🙂

This year I have had my very first propper christmas without any of the hassle from my past. No abuser, no family and I could plan it my own way and just plain celebate it together with my son ❤

Before his arrival I did some baking of catstails:

As you can see I made a lot and everything is nearly all gone now 🙂

We both decorated the christmastree red this year, with silver glitter stars and Donald Duck candy sticks, as I always wanted to have them on my tree since I saw it in the cartoon at every christmas 🙂

This year I also made my very first christmas dinner, propperly. Both pork and lamb as I am used to have it. But my son only wanted susages.. But I am satisified I made the pork perfectly and the lamb tasted wonderful too 😀

It will been a lovely christmas with my son, but I also see what I am missig when he is not around with me.. But I wouldn’t been able to had him here the past 4 years anyway… I have shielded him off and away from people that were no good for me in my childhood and he didn’t deserve to experience that and seeing his mom in the state I have been in..

I hope this is a start of being able to see him more often the coming years, and maybe able to have him back fulltime, but it won’t happen in the first or second year coming now, more trauma treatment is awaiting me.

From my son… “Mommy you have to find someone to marry again and get more kids so I can have friends to play together with, and you have to teach them English”! I say :-O Christmas is all over now, so that won’t be granted, mommy is too picky, and love don’t fall from the sky. And second after all this I am not really ready for it.. I can’t stop anyone from trying, but they first need to read “About Me”, before they do even start trying, good luck!

About Jane Helen

40 year old and single. Have a 15 yr old son that live in England with his father and family there. Got MS and PTSD.
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