When your body say STOP

I wished I could be at work like a lot of other people, but there is a lot of other people that don’t work for their reasons too.

My body has said stop, mentally and physically. Mentally I am not that well because as soon as I am standing still consentrating working, then the abuse appears automatically and I HAVE to talk about them or I am not able to consentrate about the job I am doing. It shows that it comes to a HAULT… It wouldn’t be very desent being a politician standing up to preach about sick abusing acts. I don’t think there is any other workplace where it would be accepted to talk about these things either…

Physically I have started dropping things to the floor or more correct to say throwing them around. My phone has felt the hard surface a few times. So far I manage to keep my cooking within my pans at least.

My body is saying stop on other fields too. I can’t feel the difference between hot and cold, soft or hard, not even wet or dry anymore. … If I am baking a bun it can end up as flatbread instead, take the egg too hard, or place wet clothes in my closet…

I DON’T like MY daily living! But it has become like this…

I have a goal to get back to working life. I AM! … Get back controll of my body and my thoughts. How long time will it take? … I hope for a job from New years, I can at least have a hope for it. “The future will become better”, it’s about time it starts becoming better now… Well I am better off than I was 4 years ago, I won’t COMPLAIN about that, but better than how I am mentally and physically right NOW.

About Jane Helen

39 year old and single. Have a 14 yr old son that live in England with his father and family there. Got MS and PTSD.
This entry was posted in All latest posts in English, Janne Helen's life and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

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