Today I’ve finally got to speak with my son again on the phone, after 3 weeks without hearing his voice! ❤

… It has been 3 years since my life fell into pices, but it was the beginning of getting free from the life of sexual abuse and harrasment from people who truly didn’t love me. If not they wouldn’t had treated me in the way they did…

It has been rough 3 years living without my son with me, but I have been lucky to have been able to see him at least one time each year. Last time at christmas where I staied at a hotel nearby where he lives in England. I’ve had to choose to let him live there so I could pull myself together again in my own way and it isn’t easy…

Today he talked about school and what he was learning for the first time 🙂 “I had learned about India, and they have many people and animals there mommy”, ❤ And he did take the adding 1 to 2 equals 3, and 1 to 3 equals 4, and onwards up to 20. So clever and I’m so proud of him ❤

I hope to see him this summer before the second round in the court. Either here in Norway or somewhere else. Maybe take him out for some fun in a family park or something. I would liked take him to the seaside and look at the sealife under the stones. Catching crabs, flipping stones on the water and count the jumps, we did that when he was living with me here and I wonder if he remembers any of it? Get him to enjoy the freedom of the nature ❤ … I know he don’t get much of that from his father. I would liked to trash that TV in the bin! It isn’t healthy for him to watch it! My opinion anyway.

I got that helplessness feeling of not being able to be there for him, whenever he needs me and wants me… I wish someone had stopped and listened to me and trashed my abuser many years ago when I first spoke about it!

I just have to take time to get a distance to the abusers and the history I have… Learning to live with it takes time… Cutting it up in pices and placing things where they belong. Who’s faults of what etc…

I miss my son ❤